Long Road to China - Our Adoption Story

Trustmark National Bank account set up:

Donations can be made nation wide at any Trustmark National Bank through the account:
Phillip Smith or Niki J. Smith's Adoption Account

If you would like to mail a donation, please mail it to
Phil or Niki Smith
P.O. Box 332
Rienzi, MS 38865

Saturday, July 2, 2011

May 29 at 1:21pm - Waiting Child Program

 After much prayer, consideration, and talks with our children, we decided to go the route of the Waiting Child Program.  I know some of you know about this and I've written about it on facebook, but I think it was in response to questions.  I wanted to share with you that we have chosen this program.  The waiting child program means that we might get a child with special needs {probably will} and there are varying degrees of medical conditions.  Some are extremely mild and some are severe.  We spoke with Dr. Marta {our pediatrician} and discussed the medical problems we felt we could handle.  Then we completed a checklist to let CCAI know which medical conditions we felt  were best for our home and situation.  Please know if any of our children ever have a medical problem, we will adapt our life.  However, since we already have 2  children in the home and  we aren't as young as we use to be, we felt it was best for a child with known severe disabilities to find a home that had more time available and financial resources to take care of his/her needs.

When you are expecting a baby, you usually do not know until the baby is born whether there are any problems with him/her - sometimes you will find out during the pregnancy.  However, we are in a much different situation, we are choosing to have a child that needs extra love and attention.  No, no one wants their child to have special needs/health problems.  Of course we all wish and pray for healthy children when we are expecting.  However, these children in the orphanage are already shunned in their country for being different.   We feel there is a special child that needs us.  We don't know what our child's special need{s} will be but we are prepared to handle them with love and the best we can give him/her!  We spoke with the lady that was reviewing our medical checklist on Thursday.  We are expecting our process to go much quicker than with the traditional  or non-special needs program in China.  This is another reason we are trying to complete all paperwork asap.

You may wonder why we decided to go through the waiting child program.  It does have a shortened wait time, but this was NOT the reason we picked this road.   Phil & I have always felt that all children are precious.  Both of our degrees pertain to special needs children.  I'm an occupational therapist by degree and Phil's masters degree is in mildly/moderate disabilities {K-12}.  I've always felt that special needs children need our love as much if not more than anyone else.  In high school, I would visit the special needs class.  I  always spoke to anyone in it if they were in the halls or in anywhere and tried to learn each person's name so I could call them by it.  Phil teaches high school and he said the biggest compliment a student had ever given him was when she said "Mr. Smith, you know everyone in the school and their name.  Even the ones no one talks too."  It's not a conscious decision, it's just what we do - treat everyone the same.  We are all people and are God's wonderful creation no matter how different we are to each other.

We have ALWAYS taught our children to treat everyone the same!  I think with our degrees, it made us more aware then ever that everyone needs love, respect, and to be treated as equal humans.  Our children have expressed how very much they will love their sibling no matter what the situation may be with their special needs.  I was very proud when we ask them how they felt about our baby having special needs and they said  "Of course it doesn't matter.  It will be our brother or sister.  We will love them  and that's all that matters."   I asked them how they would feel if someone made fun of him/her for being different.  Macy Jade said "I would tell the person that this is our brother and that he is special to us. I would tell them he is very sweet."   I love the innocence of a child!   I hope and pray that our children will always see the person and not the disability in everyone.  Being a therapist, I have strongly encouraged them and tried to make them more aware of people and how they are the same - not different.  I have gone up to people that I did not know in stores that had some type of physical disability and asked them {for example}  can you show my children how your prosthetic arm works.  I think this breaks down a bearer for them.  It removes some of the questions & stares from people when they understand a difference and understand hey this is a person like me.  They have always made me proud when around people that are different.  Colt was very little and in Wal-Mart one time with us.  He saw a girl about his age in a wheelchair and said "Momma, can I go talk to her."  She was just a few steps away from us and I said sure.  I listened to his conversation with her.  He started with "Hey, that's a really cool chair you have!"  He told her a few of the things that he thought were super awesome on it and then went on talking to her as he would any other child.  I have to admit I was proud and this was not an isolated incident.  Both of our children have accepted others that are different and respond to them as they would any other person.

This decision has not been made lightly and we ask for your prayers to know how to best take care of all the needs that our child may have in our loving home.  This decision also means that we may incur more medical expenses with  surgeries, doctor's visits, therapy, adaptations, training, etc., etc.  Our love for our children is boundless, but our financial resources aren't as boundless.  We know that God will see us through and provide for our needs!

Your acceptance and your prayers for our child no matter what his/her special needs maybe would be eternally appreciated!  All of these children are special and there are many children with  special needs that need and deserve a good and loving families!

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Ephesians 4:2

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