Long Road to China - Our Adoption Story


Trustmark National Bank account set up:

Donations can be made nation wide at any Trustmark National Bank through the account:
Phillip Smith or Niki J. Smith's Adoption Account

If you would like to mail a donation, please mail it to
Phil or Niki Smith
P.O. Box 332
Rienzi, MS 38865




Friday, April 20, 2012

Childlike Driven!

(I'm sorry I've not kept up with the blog as much as I should have!)  I've been posting on FaceBook & most everyone is friends with us there so I've not been posting here.  The date is the actual date this was typed. 
 April 4
This morning I sit here in awe of my Lord!  I have so many things on my mind & so many things I want to say.  However, I’m not sure my racing mind will let all the words come freely.
My gross thought today is: Why would God want to give His son for a sinner like me?  Honestly, my human mind cannot comprehend nor understand it!  However, I know He did this & He believes in me & thought I was worthy enough for His everlasting life!  How many times do we sit back & really think about how powerful His Love must be for each of us?  God knows we are humans & we sin; He loves us anyway!  He is here for us in good AND bad; it’s us that often forget to include Him, but He is ALWAYS here for us!  He loves us regardless of our sins, but we should ask for forgiveness when we sin!


He made us as humans, but in His image,
26 Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”
Genesis 1:26  (NKJV)
 But He also allowed us to have free will.
16 And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat; 17 but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”
Genesis 2:16-17 (NKJV)
However badly we hurt Him with our sins, I do not believe He ever gives up on us!  We must always strive to do better!
34 Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”
Luke 23:34 (NKJV)
Wow!  Have you ever thought how powerful some of the very last words of Christ?  As our Savior, hang dying on the cross after so much humiliation, pain, & suffering for me, you- us, Have you really thought about some of His very last words?  Forgive them!!!!  WOW!  How many of us could do that after all He had been through?  Up until His very last breaths, He was thinking of others!  Jesus was not selfish!!  He showed mercy, love & forgiveness!  Oh how I often miserably fail, but I still want to strive to be more like Jesus!


I think as humans we often lose the true reason we were placed here on earth!  The central idea in humans is often “What can I do to be happy & feel good about myself?”   We as Americans often suffer with “The American Dream” syndrome & forget it is actually not Biblical!   Is this really what God wants us to do…think of how we can make ourselves happy, feel good, live the “American Dream”?  I don’t believe it is HIS way even though I can be just as guilty as anyone else!  I don’t think God wants us to be in total misery, but I don’t believe He wants us to focus on “ME” either.  Doing God’s will may not make our human side the happiest, but what are we willing to do? We will hurt, we might suffer, we might not be seen in the best light by others, others may not understand, we may be sad, etc.  In the end we decide what actions we take -- Please “me” or follow Him??  We cannot serve two masters!
 24 “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.
Matthew 6:24 (NJKV)


 I am reminded of the following verses (and there are many more) which I feel address these issues:


24 Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. 25 For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.
Matthew 16:24-25 (NKJV)


9 And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.    Galatians 6:9   (NKJV)


30 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment 31 And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  There is no other commandment greater than these.”
Mark 12: 30 & 31 (NKJV)




19 “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal;   20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Matthew 6:19-21 (NKJV)


41 “Then He will also say to those on the left hand, ‘Depart from Me, you cursed, into the everlasting fire prepared for the devil and his angels: 42 for I was hungry and you gave Me no food; I was thirsty and you gave Me no drink; 43 I was a stranger and you did not take Me in, naked and you did not clothe Me, sick and in prison and you did not visit Me. 44 “Then they also will answer Him,[b] saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to You?’ 45 Then He will answer them, saying, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me.’ 46 And these will go away into everlasting punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”
Matthew 25:41-46 (NKJV)


3 And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.
Matthew 18:3-5




35 I have shown you in every way, by laboring like this, that you must support the weak. And remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” 
Acts 20:35 (NKJV) 


These are the points I gather from the scripture that God wants us  from us:
*We should not do as we want to do, but follow Jesus & God’s word!


* NEVER stop doing good/God’s will!


*Do not worship material possessions!


*Put your heart, soul, mind upon God!  You should only treasure Him!


*Give to those that need!!!!  Do not hoard up, but give & you will be blessed!


*We should be as a child – dependent upon Him!


*Love our Lord enough to follow His ways!


*We are all the same…….sinners!  The very best most humble & Christ like man is just like us……..a sinner!  He still wants us & wants us to turn from our wicked ways!


*LOVE Your God with all your heart & LOVE your neighbor as yourself!!! (Jesus said this is the GREATEST commandment)


Who am I?  I’m a sinner whom is embarrassed by the many ways I’ve failed & will continue to fail our Lord by sinning!  However, not perfect, I am God’s daughter!  I ask for forgiveness & am forgiven!!!  I am grateful that God has given all for me & in my eyes I will Never be worthy of His grace!  Thankfully, God does not see it that way & loves me!  He looks at my heart which is sometimes weak, sick, of the world, but I continue to try!  I’m no better nor different than anyone else!  We are ALL God’s children - disabled, weak, murders, sick, well, rich, poor, Africans, Americans, Chinese, etc., etc. etc. the list could go on for infinity!  My point is that all humans are no different in that we are all God’s children & all have sinned!  We should not look down upon those less fortunate, but as Christians we should help them & love them as ourselves!  Really, really think about the magnitude of that!  Love our neighbors as ourselves……….do we help others as we would ourselves, do we give to others as we want for ourselves, do we mourn for sickness & death of others as we would our own?  I know I’m not perfect!  I know I fail in loving my neighbor as myself; however, I give it all to Christ today!  I believe our neighbor is any other human!  Not my will, but His be done!  Being a Christian is not the “Me” life!!!  It is the most selfless thing to do to follow Christ!  Do you REALLY love your neighbor as yourself? your child/your immediate family??????  Think about it & I challenge each of us to do a better job of this each day!


God has a purpose for each of us!  He will forgive each of us
9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals,[nor sodomites, 10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.
1 Corinthians 6 (NKJV) 
We are all sinners & fall short of the glory of God, but we must not stop.  We must change our worldly ways.  I do not think that His apostles or other “famous” people of the Bible were any different than you or I!  We can make a difference just as God used each of them to make a difference for Him!  He wants each of us!


Oh Father, you know I am such a sinner!  Please forgive me!  Help me have a heart as yours!  Help me to be child like & dependent on you!  You know I’m not perfect & that I have & will fail!  Thank you for your grace that saved me & for your unconditional love!  God, I give it all to you!  I believe you wanted us to sell our vehicle that you know I loved so much!  Many may not understand, but it is a worldly possession that I treasured too much!  I know I can follow your guiding hand by doing something different!  This is not a sacrifice; a sacrifice is when you gave Your son for me! I know many people will not understand & think I am crazy when I give you my all & completely obey you to the best of my ability!  Help me not to get sidetracked by others that may not understand! God forgive these people that do not understand when someone gives it to You & does something bizarre to follow your will!  I know people thought Noah & David along with many other Biblical figures were crazy!  Help me be more obedient to you as they were & to have the ability to do as You want without carrying what others may think & that do not understand!


Mold me, make me, use me & help me to know your will & follow in Your ways!  I don’t want the happiest/easiest life; I want my life to be as You want it!  I will go where ever you lead!  Thank you for your forgiveness when I fail!  Help me to make a difference & to be able to hear your path for my life!  I’m yours to do as you want me to do!  My life here is not mine & life is such a short period of time compared to eternity with You!


Help me to follow Your commandments & to love others as myself!  Lord please help me to feed you, clothe you, give you shelter, sustain your thirst, visit with you, nurse you to health, & most of all love you by doing this to others!   You are everywhere & I’m often to busy to stop & see You!  Help me to see You wherever I go!  I beg of You to make me childlike; I covet the heart of a child!


I am all yours God so bring me the things you have me to do.  Thank you for always being by my side so that I’m not alone!  Help me know the ones that need my help; bring them to my door.  I’m ready & anxious now!  I’m blessed to think You could/would use a sinner as me to make a difference!  It is an honor!!!   I feel happier, freer, more blessed, & richer than ever when I follow You!


I do not want to serve worldly possessions - forgive me!  I want to use my possessions (that I only have because you allowed me to have) to worship & glorify Your name & to help more of Your people!  Give me the energy, faith, knowledge, & strength to follow through with Your mission for my life!!!!  Forgive me when I’ve brought or bring others down with my sins & help me not to fall into those ways again!  Help me to follow by your most important commandment as this is complete & total selflessness!  You are everywhere so help me not to overlook You!  I want to love as You do, hurt for others as You, care for others as you would & raise your name in all I do!  You are my light, my way, my truth!  I trust you with my all & love you!
 

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