Long Road to China - Our Adoption Story

Trustmark National Bank account set up:

Donations can be made nation wide at any Trustmark National Bank through the account:
Phillip Smith or Niki J. Smith's Adoption Account

If you would like to mail a donation, please mail it to
Phil or Niki Smith
P.O. Box 332
Rienzi, MS 38865

Wednesday, December 26, 2012


How often do you feel ashamed for doubting, questioning, feeling sorry for yourself, or something similar?  Honestly, there probably aren't many days that I don't see the "big" picture for a brief second. It may even be something small like burning the toast or the spilled milk.

In my last post, I wanted to be honest.  I was bummed that everything wasn't "perfect" like I wanted it!  GiGi is sick and the rest of us are fighting sickness, Guan Ya isn't with us, Christmas was slim to say the least, & we were hoping to help others more this Christmas.  

No sooner than those thoughts filled my heart I felt guilt!  How could I feel sorry that things were not perfect in "MY" mind.  I quickly thought about 
*all the families that are going through Christmas without loved ones 
*the families that know they have limited time with their loved ones 
*the orphans that have NO family to spend Christmas with nor have anyone to hold them while they are sick
*the less fortunate that are cold, hungry, or without clothing or shelter
*our military men and women that have to not only spend Christmas without their family, but often go months without their family
*the list could continue with those not as fortunate as I this Christmas!

The thankfulness continued to flow in throughout the night with more messages from our precious daughter! I praise the Lord that He has opened a door for communication between us and Guan Ya!  I praise Him for trusting us with these precious children - to me, the grandest gift is children!  There is no other greater Earthly pleasure in my opinion and to think the Lord has trusted little imperfect me with these treasures is sometimes confusing!  Why would I be blessed with so many treasures?  
I'm flawed but I love these children with everything I have in me!  I may not be able to give them many earthly possessions, but there is not another person on this earth that loves their children more than I.  I do feel I can give them something more important than material possessions.........love and the knowledge of God's love and word!  That's all I have but it's enough for me!

I'm lost for words on how I can explain how proud I am of my treasures!  My sister-friend from China call my children "honey kids" because she thinks they are so sweet!  I love that thought and the love that they demonstrate (when they aren't fighting among themselves).  Colt, Macy Jade, and Guan Ya (GiGi is too young to understand this deep emotional connection yet) love each other and they've never met!  They don't just love each other, but they love each other as siblings - they have a bond that I believe will never end!  How/why was I so blessed with such loving children?  

You can read the letters Colt and Macy Jade wrote to Guan Ya here .  Last night, I was blessed again to communicate through many messages to Guan Ya.  I sent the messages from Colt & Macy to her yesterday since it was Christmas.  Guan Ya responds back to their letters saying what a dear brother and sister they are to her.  Ya was very excited to get a message just from them.  She told them she was ready to be with them and thanked Colt and Macy for accepting her as their sister.  She also told them how much she loved them.
Wow, what a blessing!  Tears rolled down my face to think of how loving and accepting all my children are of each other!  

I've read of many other children that were adopted of older age and it sometimes takes years for the child to say I love you or call the parents mom & dad or to accept their siblings - some never do this.  We knew this prior to accepting Guan Ya as our daughter.  However, we knew she was our child and if she never accepted us as her family, she was still ours.  Her acceptance, love, and reaction to us had no bearing on our feelings for our daughter!  We were/are prepared for emotional distance and bonding to not be automatic.....it's not a warm fuzzy feeling to think about but we try to be honest & know this is likely. It is very understandable why emotional connections can be hard with older children!  This age is hard on all teens with so many changes! I cannot imagine the courage these children face to leave everything they know to have a family!  
Again, I'm praising God and in complete awe that He has picked flawed me to be this precious child's mother! I knew there was something special about her before we started her paperwork.  Yes, all children are special, but there is something different about Guan Ya!  I cannot wait to see all the things the Lord has in store for this exceptional child! 

Thank you Lord for entrusting me with such treasures!  I praise You through the storms and the sunshine!  I pray you will continue to open doors to allow our union with our daughter!  Please protect our precious children until we can unite!  I know this is your will and that you will continue to provide!  Thank you for all the faithful people you have provided along the way to help fulfill your will for us!  Thank you for trusting us with your most precious treasures!  I praise only You for it all!

For great is His love toward us & the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever.  Praise the Lord.
Psalm 117:2 NIV

I'm one Proud, honored, & blessed Mommy that is PRAISING my Lord!


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